Times of Change.

It seems that nothing is constant.

Things are always changing.

I have several magnets on my fridge. Sometimes, I will put special artwork on there. Right now, there is an Easter bunny in a field of construction paper grass. There is a renewal for my drivers license that needs to be completed. There is a super funny menopause magnet that makes me laugh. I also have some of the most important pictures in my life on my fridge. My wedding day picture with my mother, a picture of me and my babies after Tripper was born, a goofy picture of Dave... I guess that my fridge is the descriptor of my life.

Right now, I have a paper on there that reminds me that my first baby will be going to high school soon. Tonight, we have a parent-information meeting at 6 p.m.

Following that, we have a "Save The Date" for 8th grade graduation on May 24th.

On the opposite side, I had an application for my youngest baby to start Kindergarten.

When that youngest baby was born, I would sit and rock and count their ages.... Eli was nine, Emma was twenty months, and Tripper was just born.

Then, I would think about how easy it would be when:

• Eli would be 10, Emma would be 3 and Tripper would be 1.
• Eli would be 11, Emma would be 4 and Tripper would be 2.
• Eli would be 13, Emma would be 6 and Tripper would be 4.

Now, Eli is 14, Emma will be 7 and Tripper will soon be turning 5.

Not too far in the future, Eli will be 20, Emma will be 13, and Tripper will be 11.

There is nothing "easy" about it.

One day, they will be gone. It will just be me and Dave. Alone. In the house. I will miss stepping on marbles, matchbox cars, and Barbie hairbrushes. I will miss the smell of teenage boy cologne, a young man begging to have a sleepover, silly stories, and all the look-what-I-can-do's that come with kids.

These days are passing by too quickly for me.

Random Ranting and Crazy Thoughts.

I guess I am at a blogging standstill. Here are some random happenings and thoughts that I am having lately:

• I was unhappy in class this morning. I didn't want to be there. I kept yawning. I can't wait until it is bedtime tonight.
• Last night, Eli came and laid down with me and Dave. He stayed in with us for about an hour. That kid is a goof ball. If Dave would have let him, he would have got under the covers and slept with us. I am not kidding.
• Reality hit me last night that my time with Eli is limited. He will be fourteen next week. In three years, we will be doing college applications. We will be thinking about him moving to the dorms. He is already thinking about it. It is a downhill slide from here.
• I am not sure how I got to the point from having a sweet newborn baby with cute little elf ears to having a six foot tall teenager that wears men's jeans (31X32). Seriously, it happened in the blink of an eye.
• If I close my eyes, I can still smell the newborn baby smell. I can see his little fuzzy white hair and his scrawny little body. I see his perfectly formed newborn mouth.
• I will be 35 in May. I was 20 years old when Eli was born. Technically, I could be a grandma. There were several girls in my school that had babies at age 14, age 15 and age 16. If I would have had a baby at 14, that child would be 20. I would probably be a grandma. So, somewhere out there, there are women my age with grandchildren.

I just depressed myself. I need drugs. :)

I love that kid. I don't want him to go, yet I want him to get to do cool stuff. Last night, it was still Harvard. I asked him, "Eli, what do you want to do with your life?" He said, "Well, I was thinking about being a doctor and running a company."

Good combo, Eli.

A workweek-weekend. And random thoughts.

I worked alot last week and it continued on thru the weekend.

This week is not looking any better.

I am tired.

The kids came with me to work for the afternoon. I was so happy just to hear their little voices talking in the background. I love their little faces.

Tripp's feet were dirty, as were his hands, and I took him in the bathroom and I washed them. I love those little fingers and toes. I know that they will be big fingers and toes soon, so after they were "clean and shiny" (this is what Tripp calls them) I kissed them all.

I think I have told you that in different times in my life, there are certain songs that represent where I am at. For example, at a defining time in my life, Matchbox 20's song "3 a.m." was what I was.

Sometimes, that song comes back to me.

Right now, Taylor Swift is in my head. It is that Cinderella song she sings about Romeo. There is a line in the song that says "don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess" and this is what I concentrate on right now.

When I was pregnant with Emma, it was a Shania Twain song, "Forever and Always."

When I hear these songs, it takes me back to a particular time.
I wonder where I will be next year.

Two for One!

I'm BBAAAACCCKKK!

Twice in one day.. can you believe it?

Tripp's hiney problem started minimally last night... but came back this morning. So, off to the doctor's office we went. My poor boy. Now, we are scheduled to go back to Vanderbilt to a specialist - the super special regular doctor that we have is saying colonoscopy. UGH. Not, not, happy.

Kids are sleeping now. It is a late nap as they have been at Grandma's playing, and there is more important things to do than nap at Grandma's. Like playing in the rain. And playing with Mallie. And riding bikes.

Emma has a ball game tonight.

Here are some sayings of the week... some make me happy. One makes me terribly, horribly sad.

Saying #1
Scene: Tripp and Emma are fighting this morning. He is mimicking her.

Emma: "Tripp, stop copying me!"
Tripp: "Emma, that is what little brothers do!"

Saying #2
Scene: Tripp is a pervert at three.
There is a boy at VBS. His name is Brock.

Tripp: "Mom, his name is BRA-CK... see, Bra-ck! huh, huh, huh!!!"

Saying #3
Scene: Tripp is a pervert at three.
I am bending over in front of him, tying his shoe.

Tripp: "Mom, I s-eeee your braa!!!"

Saying #4
My sister came over on Monday. She and Emma played Barbies. Emma has a ton of Barbies cause I was a mother to an only boy for 7 1/2 years. She has never shown any interest in the dolls. They are really for me.

Emma: "Mom, can we play Barbies sometime?"
Me: "Sure, Emma, anytime. Why haven't you ever asked me before?"
Emma: "Cause you are always so busy."

Me: *thinking* I would like to throw up - RIGHT NOW.
Me: *actually saying* "I am never too busy for you. We will play whenever you want."

Weekend. And Eli is big.

Well, the kids have been out of school most of the week. Dave has been at home being the mom since I have now became a working mom. Not only a working mom, mind you, but a working, going to school mom. I am emotionally exhausted. But, I like my job. And I like a check. I just have to find my balance.

Yesterday afternoon, I took Eli to get a couple of things for school - things of the clothing persuasion. The cute boy who told me only two years ago that " Walmart is fine" when I asked him where he wanted to school shop - well, that boy is no more. He is still cute, yes, handsome and growing up quick. But he has been replaced with a boy that likes American Eagle, Aeropostle, Ambercrombie and all that stuff that makes me have to get a job. Standing in the store with him, I helped him pick out jeans. Not just jeans. Jeans in the MAN section. More specifically, he is no longer in the kid sizes. He wears a 28/30. How did this happen? I started out with this cute- Tommy off of the Rugrats - baby. He lay on my lap, and looked at me with those big eyes. He was so skinny and cute. Now I have a boy/man that will be 13 in a couple of weeks. Only a few years until he goes to college. Where did the time go? My first baby is big.

So, I leave you with a picture of my first born boy. Ah, Eli, I love you so much. The first time I held you was absolute magic. You made me a momma.

Eli and Matt this past summer.