A Busy Week.

Boy, have we been hopping around here. School is officially out for the kids. So, in August, I will have a kindergartener, 2nd grader and 10th grader. Wow!

My job starts on Wednesday. I am super excited. It is three days a week, five hours a day teaching Special Ed in Preschool - just for the month of June. Just to get my foot in the door. Maybe this will lead to a full time job.

My eating has not been great this week. My exercise has also been off. We have been to Vacation Bible School every night. Along with VBS comes an 8 p.m. dinner. I was doing well being finished by 6. And I think I am only at twelve miles for the week. We have had alot of rain, high heat, and thunderstorms. But it is ok. I am on a health journey, not a race. So today I will do better.

I am supposed to be having a yard sale like.. RIGHT NOW. But I am not ready. I have so.much.stuff.... clothes of Emma's, to be exact. I just don't know how to do this. Tubs, and tubs, and tubs. So I will work on it today, and maybe get some of it out. I am also selling her Disney Princess Kitchen, Vanity and Barbie Piano. She says she is too big. I have a whole nother post on that - when I get my pictures from my camera uploaded.

Have a great holiday weekend!

Healing.

Since the girls left almost two months ago, we have all went through a range of emotions. The first few weeks were the hardest for me. I seemed to be semi-ok in the mornings. Then, I was off to school, so I did not think about it, and there was little chance of someone asking me. My hardest time was in the afternoons when I came home - the was noone calling, "Ms. Mell!" and grabbing me. There was no Spanish music or cackling laughter. Now that time has passed, and shock has worn off, I have become angry. I am mad. And that is OK. I know that I am healing.

Eli was angry, hurt and confused all at the same time. But he is able to voice his feelings and deal with them. So that helps him heal.

But the worst? Emma and Tripp. They don't know how to feel. Or what to do. So their healing is different.

Emma and Tripp are still having a hard time. In the mix of the drama, it seems that not one person outside of the situation ever thought about how a five year old boy and a seven year old girl would feel to losing their sisters - sisters that had been a part of their lives for about three years - and lived with them for eleven months. Not one person ever thought that maybe Emma and Tripp would have to heal from this.

So while everyone sits and focuses on the healing of two girls that we took in as our own, that we loved and cared for and accepted, who chose to opt out of being in our family, and caused so much pain with that decision, they forget about the completely innocent kids left behind. It makes me angry that I am left to try to find the right answers. I don't have the answers.

And Now I Am Up.

Tripp is having leg/foot aches. He got up about thirty minutes ago, crying. Since he is kid number three, I know these are growing pains. I gave him some Tylenol. But now, momma can't sleep. Thoughts are racing.

I am going to have a yard sale this weekend. I am not really looking forward to it. I have bunches of clothes to get out of the house. But I am not liking the work involved. Also, my house is a mess in general. I did not do any housework this weekend. So it is a disaster. I was going to clean today while the kiddies were in school but I got a call right before seven a.m. to sub for sixth grade. I went for the extra money. So I am going to clean soon. And price some clothes and junk to get it out of here.

I have saw a few spiders lurking around. I just saw a bug in the bathroom. Now I am thinking about having the house sprayed. I will call someone in the morning. The poor bug probably just came in when we left the door open. Now it has to die. :) That sounds kinda morbid.

So, I am going to graduate school. I need to go to Tech and turn my application in. I think I might start in the fall. I am still trying to figure it out. MY head says wait till spring. Take a break. But that will waste six months time. Yuck. Not a big deal, I think that a Masters program will not be as back breaking as undergraduate. I will not have to name any rocks. But I wonder if I will have to take Statistics. I heard that sucks.

My exercise is going good. I walked six miles with Eli on Saturday night. It was fun. I skipped Sunday and Monday. Tomorrow, it is back at it. I do about three miles per day. Because I get crazy with the scales, I don't weigh. But my clothes are becoming more loose. And I feel great.

We have two more days of school. I am excited. But I will be working on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.

In less than six weeks, we will be at the beach. I can't wait.

Tripp is turning six in a couple of weeks. :-?

Randomness.

So, I have been subbing... I have been in 5th grade, 2nd grade, 1st grade, kindergarten, 4th grade. Not sure about 3rd.. Nope, no third. I have had the last two days off. It has been nice. Tomorrow - back to 1st grade.

I read this morning that I got the summer job that I applied for. It is Pre-K Disabilities extended school. It lasts three days a week for five hours a day. I am so excited. I want to plan. I am dreaming of centers, books, colors, stories. I am excited about teaching. I hope that it is a good experience for me.

Today I went shopping for supplies for my "real" classroom. I am sure that while I will only be in my summer class for fifteen hours a week, I will not have to decorate or do anything significant. I hope that I have a job in the near future because I bought some super cool border. And stickers. And glue. And lots of teacher things.

Yey! I am so excited!

Graduation.

College graduation is a great feeling. I had a wonderful day.

Here is my special day in pictures.

Here I am with Eli, Emma and Tripp outside of TTU.

After everyone was seated, and I got my hat balanced on the top of my big hair, Dave and I took our obligatory self photo.

Here is half of my graduating class. We may or may not have been praying. I was probably crying. I cried several times. I am smack dab in the middle and I am kinda looking up. See me?


Finally, after an hour, it was my turn. I wore heels. I did not fall!
I heard my kiddies hollering at me. So I threw them a big kiss.

Here I am shaking Dr. Bell's hand. Yey for me! I did it.

Horray for my family. They survived!

Wait. That is not Dr. Bell. He is not wearing a gown. I don't know who this dude was. I had a line of about eight people that shook my hand.



Here I am going back to my seat.

We turned our tassels. The most exciting moment for me. Then, I cried some more.

Outside, I found my family. The pictures kinda look like a kid took them.

That is because Tripp and Emma are the photographers.

Tripp took this picture. He cut Dave's head off. But here I am with my support system. My sweet inlaws. (My side of the family got in their cars and drove away when graduation was over so I never saw them. No pictures)

A random shot of Emma and myself. After we got home, we had a party. My sweet husband did an excellent job. It ended with just him and me karaoke-ing on my mother in law's porch - all alone- about 11 p.m.

So, what the next step? I went to TTU on Monday and got my application for graduate school.

I kinda slid it into a conversation with Dave on Monday night. His reply? Are you trying to start a fight? So, for now, I guess I am just getting a job :)

Until he figures out how much more money I will make with a Masters Degree. :)

Operation Graduation

So the countdown is on to Graduation 2011.

I have been subbing all week. Today is a half day! Horray for me! Yeah for a paycheck!

Here are a couple of updates:

#1 - On my last day of student teaching, I got called to

the office. My sweet father in law sent me flowers!

#2 - Late yesterday afternoon, I met with some other

Education graduates at TJ Farr and we decorated our hats.

After three trips to Hobby Lobby and a mini meltdown due to OCD -

I am finished!

Look how snazzy!

It is much better in person!

*at the bottom it says

Thanks Dave!

Eli - Emma

Tripp

Just strolling along...

So, for the past couple of months, I have been walking. I usually walk two to three miles a day. When I take the day off, I feel cruddy. It is better than being medicated :) Mentally, it tides me over and is really been my saving grace after the past couple of months.

Anyways, I went for my normal walk yesterday. I love to walk around town. I see all sorts of people, I look at flowers, and trees and shrubs. I wave at people. They wave at me. I sing to myself and I pray. I figure things out.

During the week, I start my walk on the square so I can leave my keys with Dave at the store. I usually walk all the way thru town. If I see a street I like, I take it. And I always end back at the store. So yesterday, I was less than a block from the store, and out of the corner of my eye, three pit bull dogs charged at me from across the street. All I had in my hands were my cell phone and my Ipod. I started screaming. The owners (three people) were in the yard. The man ran toward me and tried to swat them back. Two dogs ran, the third backed off a little. Then, the man turned to yell at the two other women in the yard. The third dog came at me again. He got on my back and bit my hind quarters.

I cried quite a bit. All I could do is try to back up against a fence and I kept trying to dial Dave's number. I was close enough to the store that I could see that he was there. I mis-dialed the number a few times. The dogs were back, but barking at me. The owners were fighting amongst themselves. Never once did they ask if I was OK.

So, I got Dave and he couldn't understand me. I kept trying to tell him to come outside. I was outside. Look down the road. And he saw me and ran down there. He was not a happy person.

The police were called. They called an ambulance. I knew all the workers because we live in a small town. They wanted to look at my backside. :) I said no, no and no. I did let a female ambulance worker look. And I did not go to the hospital. But I should have, to be medicated for a heart attack.

So, do I walk or not? I always felt safe in town. We do have a leash law and the owners of the big dogs were given a citation. But what if I had Emma or Eli or Tripp with me? Sometimes, they walk too.