Questions I Don't Want to Answer.

Here are some things I have heard recently:

1. Hey Mom, What does SEX mean?



2. What is GAY?



3. How do babies get out?



4. What does it mean when you do this? (sticking up the middle finger)

Needless to say, these are things I am not ready for. I have had to answer these, and tread lightly, giving minimal information.

Would you like to know my answers?

Sure you would. Here we go.

1. So I said, "What do you think it means?" and Emma replied, "Wellll, Sally asked her daddy and he said it means if you are a boy or a girl. You usually check it on a paper for school so they will know what you are." Horray for Sally's daddy! I bypassed that and I would have never thought of it. Feel free to borrow :)

2. Again, this wonderful questions came from Emma as we were driving through Nashville the other day. I wondered what she had just saw. I asked "Why?" and she replied, "Just tell me, already." So I reverted back to when Eli was in 3rd grade, and he refused to sing, "When Johnny Comes Marching Home" for Veteran's Day Program at school because Johnny would be gay. And I said, "It means HAPPY". Emma replied, "Tammy's mom said it meant something different - something bad." And I said, "Oh, Emma! Look! It's Toys-R-US!"

3. This question came from all three -Emma, Mallie and Tripp - as Aunt Terri was having our new baby Adaline. After listening to various comments that included a "door in the belly that a baby can open" and Tripp's answer - "Momma's poop babies out of their butts", I answered with "Momma's have a special place for babies to come out." And that ended it with two of them. But not Emma. So we had a mini -conversation of where that special place is located.

4. This one came from Tripp, while I was in the Verizon store, upgrading my phone, sitting at the counter. We were the only customers in there - with three workers who thought my kids were "the cutest things ever". Until Tripp stuck his middle finger up at every one of them as he asked loudly. I took him to the car as they were programming my new phone. He tried to run from me. I swatted at him and I missed. He then told them that I smacked him in the head. And for the record I didn't but I felt like it. :) Not only did my sweet boy flip people off, his momma hurt him. Needless to say, he was grounded when he got home.